1.) Bond issue for the purchase of a state-of-the-art atomic self destruct mechanism for Middlesex County.
2.)A Klaxon in Every Bathroom (Note: Stimulus funds pending)
3.)Fully fund "Leave no Troglodyte Behind". (Application filed with US Department of Education)
4.) Decommission the Massachusetts State Recluse Academy.
5.)Dam up the Charles River, freeze it using 100% green-certified dry ice and establish a year round "reserve polar ice cap".
6.) New Elementary School drive to suppress early childhood jell-o drownings.
7.) Babes, Chicks, Frails & Skirts.
8.) Establishment of a Umass Amherst School of the Black Arts.
9.) Revise and simplify the state's first in the nation chowderhead certification program.
10.) National Guard Rocket Patrol.